Fifty Shades of Grey
By: E L James
Publication: April 17, 2012
Genre: Erotica
Pages: 1501
Fifty Shades Trilogy Bundle: Fifty Shades of Grey; Fifty Shades Darker; Fifty Shades Freed
(If you liked Fifty Shades, you might want to stop here.)
Fifty Fucking Shades of it!
Before the book was even released there was soooo much hype about how CONTROVERSIAL and SALACIOUS it was!! (One could try attribute the letdown to this but that wasn't it.) Libraries were refusing to buy it saying oh how they don't want that type of smut in there stacks! And the waiting lists for those that did were in triple digits!!! (By the way I looked up one of these libraries, that made it a point to very publically say they didn't want this type of book, yeah, I searched their books and found SOOOOO many 'worse' books...and yes of course I'd read them!)
This is what I though we'd get.
Oh I was so off.
I have never wanted to strangle, maim, or smack the living shit out of a female character more than Anastasia Steele. The "Inner Goddess" shit is annoying, as is Ana. She's a 21 yr old virgin college student whose more like a high school freshman that's been homeschooled all her life (without cable or friends). Prudish, immature, sexually repressed virgin agrees to contractual D/s relationship..... What the fuck!!??
Tween Disney TV shows are less annoying.
Christian Gray, alpha male. He's mastered everything at the ripe old age of 27, he's a self made billionaire, pilot, fluent in French, mastered the piano, sex god, and oh so tortured.
He's annoying, immature, confused, and an asshole. Completely unrealistic, even by romance novel standards! He's a wanna be alpha.
Neither comes across as capable of being fully functional adults in society. 
For all the media buildup, it took forever to get to a sex scene. All the hyped BDSM. It's a poor excuse. Mr. Grey continually threatens and never actually follows through (but he's an experienced Dom....huh?). Oh and he's got a fucked up childhood so lets blame it all on that.
If you're curious, do me a favor, Google it and you'll learn more. The writing....... It's like an elementary school student with a word a day calendar; Oh how can I fit that word in today??!! (She did say she was inspired by Stephanie Meyer, no shit, I swear, heard it in an interview)
I can't even believe it was made into three books (yes 3!!). I can't believe I read all 3! Why you ask?? (yeah.... I did too.) If you've ever seen Napoleon Dynamite you might understand. I needed to see how it ended. Kinda like watching a train wreck. I had to make it to the end.
The last book is completely useless. I think she put ideas in a hat and pulled one out to write the book.... "Oh yes! This would make a wonderful plot conflict idea!". Or maybe it was rock paper scissors.....
Annnnd their making a movie...... This had better be a case where the movie is a shit load better than the book.
Now, if she writes something in the future I MIGHT read it. Her skills will no doubt have improved. These are her first books and it does show.
Will I see the movie? *Sigh*
Probably.
I tend to prefer this trailer to the original ;)
Still wanna read it? This book seems to be a love/hate book, judge for yourself, you just might like it! Click the link below to purchase:
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